It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
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