so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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