I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
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