quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Randomize
