I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
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