my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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