I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
