What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
