i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
