Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Randomize
