If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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