Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
