College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
