He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Randomize
