I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
