oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
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