Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
