I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
My life is pants optional.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
