He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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