i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
