This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
