So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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