The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
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