last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize
