I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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