I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
