we made out on top of his cat.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
