i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
