If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
