Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Randomize