are you still at the devil's house?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
