Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
