im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
