Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
