dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
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