Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
it was like eating out sand paper
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
