Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
