I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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