ya dads aren't the best wingmen
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
