Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Another day, another engagement, another cat
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
