You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
