theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Randomize
