Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
