Hey man sorry I got all grabby
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
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