I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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