I can't watch pbs sober anymore
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
