that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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