Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Randomize
