so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
