worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
